I don’t mind kids on planes
But parents please don’t be moronic assholes, K?
My flight to the east coast was something I couldn’t have come up with as fiction if I had tried. I’ll make this short as a long rant really isn’t needed. Imagine arriving at your seat on a fully sold out flight and seeing a 5 year old and an 8 year old in your row with no parent in sight. Yeah.
The 5 year old next to me was just adorable. She actually said, “you’re handsome!” to me. Jen had to explain to me that the child was in fact talking to me. I mean come on that’s never happened on a plane before to me. Likely never again as well.
Without going into the complexities of the seating here are some simple rules to follow if you’re going to travel with your children:
Sit with them. I know the airlines screw you on this one, but please book early and get yourself a row or in this case rows. If the airline won’t sit you with them then have a plan to move the fewest people on arrival and ASK us. I don’t know where you are or where your husband/baby daddy is so speak the fuck up. Yes we would have switched, but it wasn’t for another 30-40 mins that Jen and I figured out exactly where the family was and how we could have fixed this shit. Yes we would have. Just ask us.
Please when your daughter is having pleasant conversation with me which I don’t mind, don’t yell at her to shut up. You know who it embarrasses? Me. Not your 5 year old.
Next up: if you do have to sit one of your children with a stranger make it the eldest. Not the next to the youngest so your baby daddy can spend the whole flight asleep next to the 10-12 Year old.
Also while we’re at it, those names are not children’s names. Please name your children in ways strangers can pronounce and not want to laugh at you for being stupid. K?
I’m just happy she was a nice little kid and not a problem. The mom on the other hand not so nice and much more of a problem.
